That's where I am this evening.
Two things are about to happen: the Johannes Mehserle trial is about to be over in Los Angeles and I'm about to have yet another summer of being extremely short-staffed at work. One way or another, a bone's gonna get broken--either because I have to work on the other side of the world, or because I have to work without enough help.
The *only* upside to this is that usually during times like this I lose an incredible amount of weight. Not in a good way--I either end up not getting to eat, or I lose whatever I eat within the hour of eating it and then stumble around dehydrated.
Ah, yes, stumbling. That's the part where I broke something last year.
The problem here is that I'm supposed to be smart enough to do this without completely killing myself and here I am again, unable to see forest for trees and feeling really dumb about the whole thing.
So here's my little prayer to God or the muses or whomever is listening--please make this be worse in my mind. Please don't let it come true. And if it has to come true, please let some good come from it...or find some way to make it end so that I don't have to keep doing it.
And what I've been reading to try to settle my nerves:
- The poetry of Billy Collins
- Tao Te Ching
- Natalie Goldberg
- And listening to anything calming I can find on my iPod
Just breathe, dear reader.