Friday 'Facing

Cozy, sleepy autumn night. (Don't forget, folks...it's still fall until the 22nd...shocking, I know.) I am home and can feel my extremities again after a field trip to Ghirardelli Square to watch my candles on the water.

If you want to get away from the holiday bustle, the best place is Ghirardelli Square. This is a sad fact for the people who own this real estate, I'm sure, but it was peaceful for me. People are always telling me to relax, and I was finally able to do it there. After a God-awful meal at Lori's Diner, I walked through the lights and past the trees to the cocoa caffe and got a small hot chocolate with marshmallows (Warhol would give you the price of the hot chocolate, but I am a romantic), and the clerk and I chatted it up about my bag and wallet combo. I switched to the Timbuk2 bag full time thinking that we were heading into rainy season. Jinx.

My aunt had a cat named Jinx once...

Anyway, then I walked back out to the seats on the upper level and watched the Christmas boats go back and forth from Fort Mason to Pier 39. Something tugged in me of my mom, and a rush of emotions. I wanted her there and remembered four seconds later the bonus in her passing--she is there. So we enjoyed the boats, and talked over some stuff. I was lonely but not alone.

Then back here on the F and the 6, and DK was having a field day with Facebook--kind of nice after the acute solitude.

Did I do everything I wanted to on my vacation? No, and yes. It was a very good one. I know what I need to do with my job situation and FG is still there on the surface but I am sure I will never see him again...and I won't miss him. Tired of lip service, I embrace the second tier but still look for someone who's lookin' for me, as Clint Black would sing it.

I'm off to watch Mame. Good night, dear reader, selah and sleep well.